June 19-21

June 19-21, 2014

Thankfully I’m on vacation this week (this true week of July 4th to the 11th and still going strong until the 14th). It couldn’t have come at a better time.  Starting to get that burnt out feeling from every day life stuff. You know the feeling. That buildup that forces you to close your eyes. You literally feel your heart racing AND beating up against your chest wall, knocking to make its way out of you. You take a few full, deep, slow breathes. Your nostrils flare to allow extra oxygen in. Talking yourself out of wishing everything and everyone to just “Poof!” away. Then reminding yourself that things for someone else, somewhere else is doing much worse. Isn’t it pitiful that the thought of someone else’s misery can put things in to perspective? Oh well. Not going to knock myself over that one. Here’s my latest batch and once again, I apologize for the delay. Yes, I jotted these down way back when and just couldn’t make my way to slowing down enough to get this posted. I’m sure you too are backed up with something that should have gotten done some time ago. Admit it!

1. Take my advice; once you hit the age of 25 you need to move past your childish ways of shunning others just because they don’t fit in to your IMMATURE imagined “popular” standards. Just stop fantasizing about being team “Mean Girls” and grow up. God don’t like ugly.

2. To the stupid, stupid guy who pumps my gas. Did you seriously stand there and try to trick me in to taking Super over Regular?  You honestly thought your lame ass story that you didn’t have Regular was believable? So I could spend more? I may be a woman, but you’ve been cursed with stupid.

3. Honestly, what is it with men flipping the bird to women in mini vans? You obviously know the driver is a mother. Why else would we be driving this type of car? And you know that it is highly likely there are kids in this car. It’s a damn minivan. What else do you think I’m carrying in here? Did your penis grow an extra inch because you flipped the bird? Did you feel more like a man by doing so? You pitiful little men with little penises and little self esteems. It’s cute that you think being an a-hole was going to help you in that department.

4. If I’ve told you the same thing once, twice, three times and each time it proved itself to be so, why are you fighting it? If you’re so smart, just follow through. Is your pride that powerful to stand by something that history has clearly shown you’re wrong? Argue until you’re blue in the face. Get this; You…Are…Still…WRONG!

5. New York tourists. You’re killing me. You complain that New Yorkers are rude. We aren’t rude by nature…you’re just PISSING US OFF. Don’t just abruptly halt to take a picture; step to the side! Quit looking up all the time! Don’t take up the entire sidewalk especially during rush hour! Always stay to the right when walking! And for all that is holy and good, STOP wearing those darn fanny packs!

6. As I’ve stated in past weeks; why can’t you contribute to the bills in the home you claim to be yours. Stop free loading. No one, absolutely no one lives for free. This is the law. Pay up, pay your dues or relinquish ownership.

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